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lil_c_lo
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read my profile
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Birthday: 2/16/1981
Gender: Female
Interests: i love going to indie and hardcore shows. music is a HUGE passion of mine, i also sing. i would have a list of bands, but it would be too long. i appreciate art and love people. i love seeing people figure out what life is about...and that is being all God wants you to be and loving Him with all of your heart.
a perfect day to me would be sleeping in, cuddling with the hubby while watching a movie, then going to omaha to eat dinner, get coffee, and see friends.
oh yeah...i have a sporty side too. i love football, basketball, soccer, ultimate frisbee, and of course "extreme" sports like skateboarding, snowboarding, and bmxing.
Expertise: Loving my husband, family, and friends.
Occupation: Wifey, with a sociology degree
Industry: Sociology/Ministry
Message: message meEmail: email me
Member Since:
4/10/2003
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| i got the job. i start training monday morning. it's telemarketing and customer service stuff. i hope this job works out well.
i will be entering a new era in my life soon. we hope to get rid of more debt.
this weekend will be strange. i am going to a conference with my hubby for his job. it's in omaha but we won't be able to do anything outside of the conference. it will be sad for me. we do get a hotel room to ourself, so that will be nice.
nothing else going on really.
i am really looking forward to thanksgiving and christmas. there's family and friends that i'm dying to see and spend quality time with.
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| you know, i was willing to give obama a chance when he became president, but he has yet to impress me in any way, shape or form. but i do pray for the man and i do not wish ill will upon him.
what really irritates me is all of the young people that don't even know why they are "probama". i never hear them say anything pertaining to information or statistics they've found to support him. if you were to ask them why they are for obama, they couldn't come up with anything clever. don't get me wrong, if someone has good reasoning and can back up why they are for obama, then more power to them. i hate it when someone who hops onto every pop culture bandwagon and claims to be behind a politician never has anything clever to say regarding politics.
America has borrowed so much that just the interest on its debt is now more than what the country spends on the war in Iraq. And the money the Obama administration is borrowing for the stimulus package adds another $350 billion in interest.
he has spent more in the first 100 days of his presidency than bush spent in 7 years of his presidency.
i would sit and have coffee with obama, but i do not think i could back him up in his politics.
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| sometimes i have these days where everything seems so lifeless.
there are so many people i miss.
and every opportunity i have to have something to look forward to and see people i truly care about gets stomped all over.
when you are trying to see the light and the clouds are constantly covering it, life gets difficult to deal with.
You would settle for anything that would make your brain slow down or stop/ Break this circle of thoughts you chase before they catch back up with you/ Try to find some source of light, try to name one thing you like/ You used to have such a longer list, and light—you never had to look for it/ But now it’s so easy to second-guess everything you do/ This feeling used to pass, but it seems like it’s every day, seems like it’s every night now. conor o'berst--“A Line Allows Progress, A Circle Does Not”
i'm not a conor fan, but i saw these lyrics posted in an article and i could totally relate.
even christians get depressed. it happens. it's called the human condition and we are all involved with it.
love you all.
i hope to get out of this funk soon. it sucks.
 Cindy
oh yeah, and you've got to love when other christians in leadership positions don't understand what you are going through. they don't know the amazing people you've met along your journey of life, they don't know the beautiful things you've seen, and they think they can just go ahead and judge you. there's this thing called grace. all i ask is for someone to hold my hand along the way, even if i'm being wrong. i always come around. it's part of the growing process and trusting that God will bring you through and will work in everyone's lives around you, not just your own. it's ok to mourn and be sad and depressed. if i didn't have a heart that loved so much, this wouldn't hurt so much, and i would rather have a heart that loved and saw the beauty in this world and hurt because of it than never loved or seen before.
we serve a God that loves, and it's not always about your feelings. i am well aware of this, i just need to cope right now.
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| who knows what life will bring next.
don't ever take it for granted.
it's funny when life is dependent on something the size of a speck between your toes....on the surface of the skin...
things are somewhat difficult still, so keep the chadwicks in your prayers. there's so much stuff going on!!
love you all.
i REALLY mean it...
Cindy
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| not much has changed since the last entry. it still feels weird being here. and it really sucks when you need a dogsitter, and it's like pulling teeth. i can honestly say if we were in atlantic needing a dogsitter, people wouldn't blink an eye before helping us out. i can understand that people have priorities, but come on. if anyone wants us to be effective here in ministry, we need help with the small stuff. otherwise, they won't be getting much of my help here.
the few closer friends we have here just had a kid, so that cancels them out. the captains are overwhelmed with their lives running the salvation army church and community center and also being parents to a 6-year old, so that cancels them out most of the time, because they will take the dog for a day if we have to be away for an event that we both have to help with. one of our friends lives with said friends who just had a kid, and feels the need to help them out, even though they have plenty of friends in the community, so lately she hasn't been much of any help. one new friend we just made spent a week housesitting and watching the dog for us while we were on vacation. she is amazing and becoming a great friend. but guess where she is going in september? yeah, ywam for 6 months. i'm happy for her, but it's like there's a dead end after dead end.
i still don't feel any serious connection.
i can also say that if will were to find a better job closer to the eastern side of nebraska and western side of iowa, and we had to leave here for some reason, i don't think i'd cry. i guess the roots just aren't firmly grounded.
well, time for a mad dash. we're having someone over for dinner, hubby's idea not mine, and this place is a pit as always because this house sucks. and i don't know how i feel about this girl. i mean, she's nice, but i just don't know. i get an "i'm not good enough" feeling around her and i don't know why.
oh yay.
time to put on a face.
i hate it here.
edit: lesson learned. i calmed down and gave this girl another chance. she is pretty cool. we had a good night. my lesson learned: give people more than one chance and don't trust your feelings too much. also, don't sweat the small stuff so much :)
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